In case you’re all wondering…

…why I’d spend such little money on underpants, take a look at this sweet thing. 

Yes, because the only thing keeping me from enjoying wine, cheese and an afternoon nap on my queen size garden bed is the cost of really nice undergarments.   

Picture it.  Mosquito netting over head, cool breeze coaxing its way through suffocating humidity just so much that I need the blankie over my legs.  I pen some of my novel before sipping wine and fading into a deep, perfect nap.  Made so because it’s the middle of the summer and I should actually be watching my children.  But who watches their kids these days, right?  The days of the hovering parents intent on giving their kids everything they didn’t have themselves is so passe’.  Why else would Sam’s Club offer such a thing as a garden bed?  I mean who else would make use of a garden bed but a stay at home mom?  I get it, relax, booze it up, have some fun, shake off the stress.

Lucky for me, my children are angels.  As the wind leaps over my body, teasing me awake before letting me fall back asleep, the kids frolic in the yard, just beyond the fountains slightly behind the garden bed, humming as they direct their own play, lightness and sunshine stalking them. 

When I awake they scamper onto the garden bed, eyes bright, they show me the jet powered skateboard they fashioned while I was “away.”

Boy, I can’t wait for summer. 


4 thoughts on “In case you’re all wondering…

  1. That would be SO awesome. And its true, they always show models on the beds, and theyre always these romantic childless couples in their 30s, but really it shoudl be a plump lady in her PJ’s. Awesome.

  2. Jessie, don’t forget the kids crawling over her, imprinting the entire scene with muddy handprints and jelly stains from sticky faces! Not to mention the practicalities–where are these people living where it never rains and crap? My garden bed would surely be co-opted by snakes and squirrels and a deer or two.

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