I know this is new at the cafe–useless information. So brace yourself and hang in there.
1. Nicole Richie and her fiance’ DJ AM might have body image issues. (OK! Magazine) No freaking way! Gastric Bypass for AM and starvation for her. Body issues?
2. Paris Hilton checks out a sexy negligee at Victoria’s Secret (OK! Magazine) What? She doesn’t buy her underpants at Giant Eagle Grocery Store? My world shudders with the news.
3. OK! Magazine muses about the impact that a marriage between Brad and Angelina would have on speeding up the adoption process. Apparently it would not help. The social workers making less in a year than what Brangelina spend on clothing for three fancy affairs know a thing or two about children and crazy parents? Preposterous!
4. Lindsay Lohan has a crush on both Angelina and Brad…hmmm…uh, no…not possible…yes, yes, okay. Great idea. Angelina could do a kind of group adoption thing. Maybe TOGETHER, they could all form one good parent. Rude. Very, very Rude of me. Completely inappropriate commentary. Forgive me.