Chronic Illness blows.
For me, that means Multiple Sclerosis.
But recently things have been getting better.
By recent I mean in the last six months.
I’m surprised everyday that I’m feeling better.
I’m more suprised when feeling better lets me realize just how bad I felt.
There are people in my life who have no idea how bad it sucks to feel like crap on a daily basis.
They don’t care to understand and they don’t quite believe that just because someone doesn’t look like they have one foot on a banana peel and the other in the grave, they might still feel like crap. For real.
But today, when my mom asked if I needed her to come tomorrow, I could say “No thanks,” without worrying if declining the help would mean the three days after would be kicking my ass.
I can’t tell you how great that feels.
To be able to handle my own life.
I can’t tell you how great it feels to be there for real, not because I’m forcing myself to be positive when my body hates me.
Not because I’m saying no to help because I’m crushed by what others are thinking about me and my unseen ailment.
Today felt great and I can only hope this is a trend…Sorry for the depressing post…my realization was actually quite happy…
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