Grumpy Husband

I don’t really post grumpy husband rants because he doesn’t bug me that much…he’s a great husband, but today, he went on some crazy “I can’t take all these toys…”bullcrap and pissed me off. Yes there are toys everwhere, but NEWSFLASH we have KIDS…gasp, your kidding. When did they get here? He might as well have said…I’m not a pristine housekeeper like so many of my good and even not so good friends, but part of the mess is his. For example, as he’s stomping around mumbling insane stuff under his breath, he manages to look right past the box of his work crap which has been sitting on the coffee table (really the table is a cute antique trunk, in case you’re wondering) for four days. It’s still there now. He literally didn’t see it.

Same goes for his pain in the ass piles (not hemorroids, but extraneous crap piles) of clothes, dirty and clean, piles of magazines, crap from his pockets, mail, shoes, and dishes he can get to the sink but not into the dishwasher six inches to the right…He can’t see any of this…So I give him the business (not the fun kind) and shuffle him off to his mother’s with the kids for dinner.

He grew up with a perfect home–his mother never slept–so he has this nutty expectation that things magically clean themselves up. I could be better at being a housewife, I know. But I ‘m writing a book, taking care of kids, putting away his damn piles. So yes, the toys spread. I’m tempted to take photos…that’s a great idea. I’ll post some soon. ..they’re home….

22 thoughts on “Grumpy Husband

  1. Kathie!! Are we married to the same man??

    My husband’s mother used to wipe off the lightswitches and the telephone every night when she cleaned up the kitchen after dinner. You will not catch me doing this sort of thing in this lifetime or the next!!!

    You’re allowed to have your rant. You’re not alone!

  2. Are you the keeper of the stuff? I am! Note, I say “we” below, not meaning “I” but meaning “WE” as in the two of us.

    “I can’t find my stuff.”
    “Where did you leave your stuff?”
    “I don’t know.”
    “Did you look in the stuff putting place?”
    “No.”
    “Go look, because that’s where we always put the stuff.”
    “Thanks, I found my stuff right where the stuff goes!”

    Not only this, but I’m supposed to know where stuff I’ve never laid eyes on before is.

    “Have you seen the trophy I won in third grade for best attendance?”
    “No. Did you have it out? I didn’t know you won a trophy!”
    “I didn’t have it out. Just wondering if you knew where it was.”
    “Ask your mom where it is.”

    And then there is stuff he’s laid his eyes on a million times.

    “Do you know where that elephant in the living room is?”
    “Well yeah, in the living room?”
    “Oh yeah, thanks!”

  3. Oh Lordie, Kathie, Don’t even get me started on this subject…All I will say is I feel your pain. Oh, do I feel your pain.

  4. O.k. girlies…here goes. Two of my old roomies responded to this one (hey girls). You know how clean we were…I mean me (smile). Look Kath, I have become anal in my old age as you know. At night I cannot rest knowing that stuff is everywhere. I pack it all away in interesting containers (be creative…anything to hide the stuff). Remember ages ago when new wifes were given the idea that in a quick fix toss the stuff in the oven? Sometimes ya bitch about it and sometimes ya just got to clean it up. Our grass is alot greener than most and compared to other husbands out there…we’ll keep ours. That’s not to say that they are not pain in the asses and think we should be like their mommas and do it all. But sometimes wit prevails. If he is bitching about the mess. Stowe it away so all that remains is his crap! Then red will have to think again (I love em’).

    We are not Martha even though the world thinks our generation should be. You are my Audrey Hepburn. I am Kath Hepburn (I love pants and booze). Niki

  5. You might want to tell him to leave a tip for the damn Cleaning Fairy so she’ll clean up better next time…plus the Laundry Fairy, the Sorter Fairy, the Toy Picker Upper Fairy, etc…$50 a pop should do it, don’t you think??

    By the way, I think this is another symptom of the Y Chromosome Disorder, since I and every woman in a relationship with a man seems to experience this. Pray for our sons (or more likely our daughters)!

  6. Oh, Susan, my friend…this is where it all gets so thorny…Bill DOES much of the laundry…that is he washes the clothes and makes those piles that I put away….I know, I can’t complain about that. It’s not the point….you know what I mean…love the fairy stuff…where can we get one?

    Nicole/black Kate Hepburn, you misunderstand…we have all those cute storage contraptions, but mid-day, on the weekend, there’s gonna be toys around and that’s just life…I’m not the toy picker-upper-fairy (see susan) , sister! It is possible and we usually do share the responsibilty (currently teaching/bribing the kids to take over) but in the midst of the most important revision of my life, was not the time to go nutso over the obvious…
    YOu should prob. loosen up. Nicole L. gets it…

    Absentminded and Jill you both made my husband chuckle…he loves the the comparison to your (Jill’s) MIL and Becky’s dialogue…yes we’ve had those exact conversations.

  7. Kathie, I think I fall into to grumpy wife category instead. I keep complaining about the unpacked boxes that Duke has sitting around. And today while I showered Wes decided to empty them so I went on a rant that if he had already unpacked them or moved them to the basement I wouldn’t have his books all over the living room!!!!! I go on about other things too but I we don’t need to go there! Love the blog!!!

  8. You just recited a day in the life of ME! My husband is the exact same kind of mess-leaver, identical, I tell ya! And yeah…newsflash, we have frigging YOUNG children (you especially). And when you’re home all day with them, it’s a ridiculous chore to “keep” the house tiday–it would ilterally take all of your time, because they are constantly making more messes. It will get easier, as your little ones reach an age where you can really count on them to pick up for themselves, but damn. Good luck…

  9. Hi ladies,
    Been there, done all of that. AHH!!! relax now they have left home, but NO then you get the grumpy old man syndrome.
    I throw my hands in the air!!!!!
    Wait for it. It will knock on your door, sooner than you think!!!

  10. I am so glad to know that I am not alone. My Husband is always losing his wallet, keys and cell phone. And of course I am supposed to know where it is. I work full time and am expected to take care of the house, 2 kids, bills and grocery shopping and cooking. Of course he is too tired from work to help out. Well get a new job so your not so tired and grumpy. And he would chain me to the house if he could. He never want me do to things with my freinds because that means he would have to take care of the kids. And they are 6 and 8 now so its not that much work…. Besides that he is a good husband not out at bars and running around. He usually stays in the garage working on cars or bikes. Its like do I just do it all or be miserable and fight about it?

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  12. Hey

    I was surfing the web and i saw this site, pretty cool.
    Currently im running and adult site:Reachton
    k, just want to say hi 🙂
    Can i link you from my site? im looking for quality content like yours. If no let me know if i can add u in exchange for a montly fee or something.

  13. Hey

    I was surfing the web and i saw this site, pretty cool.
    Currently im running and adult site:Reachton
    k, just want to say hi 🙂
    Can i link you from my site? im looking for quality content like yours. If no let me know if i can add u in exchange for a montly fee or something.

  14. Come visit my blog, Alice. I’ll show you spoiled. Please pay particular notice to my post ‘Any Old Port in a Storm.’ I cover this very issue. My husband, excellent man though he is, leaves piles lying all over the house. Keys here, wallet there, newspapers, mail, clothes. I wear myself out following around, cleaning them up. Why in the world shouldn’t I whine about it? How can that possibly be considered spoiled?

    Even good kids can be difficult to raise. Even great husbands can be pretty damned irritating. And even perfect wives (myself and Kathie included) can — albeit only very rarely — be touchy from time to time. If the men want to gripe about us, it’s a free country — let them gripe. As for me, just don’t get in my way when I’m doing it. Griping is every woman’s birthright.

    Go out and gripe yourself — it’s wonderfully therapeutic.

  15. Good morning,

    From what I have read here it sounds like this is ladies only site…but this is a problem that I have had for years…and it is looking like it is getting worse. I am 65 and my wife is 60…She has had it made all of our married life 40 years…at leat in my eyes. My pet peeve and in the past is piles of things all over the house. And it is getting worse now that she is retired…She is one of the worst housekeepers that there is. I help all over the house, I cook almost every meal, wash dishes etc…HER biggest job is doing the laundry (and the only reason that she doesn’t like me to do it is that I don’t do it the way she likes). I have threatened to throw thngs out, put things away, given her boxes, stacked things on top of each other etc…all to no avail. My grown kids have talked to her, told her that they are embarased to have people over to the house etc…Is this some sort of mental disorder?

  16. Tell me is my husband the only one that can enter the room and all of a sudden the room goes from cheerful and jolly to downright miserable. What the hell is that about. He is a great man, great provider, great father and all, but sometimes I wish he could have his own place, just for his crappy moods. He says when he is very miserable when I am going through PMS. How about, he has PMS all the darn time. At least mine is confined to 3 days during the month.

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